Left To Tell...the Truth? (Christmas Eve Reflections)

Last night I attended a Christmas Eve service with my friend Violette, a middle-aged Rwandan woman who teaches trauma-counseling workshops in churches around the country. I have utmost respect, appreciation, trust, and enjoyment of her, and often have said that I wish I could come back to follow her around, listen to her stories, and transcribe them into a book.

A few of you have read the book "Left To Tell," about one of the survivors of the genocide. Last night Violette confided in me that the pastor in the book who hid Immaculee was actually her [Violette's] father, that the woman weren't actually in the bathroom for more than a few hours (they were in another small but slightly larger room), and that there were many other fabricated, novel-esque, and manipulative details included in the book. Her father (who for many years never knew the derogatory content of the book since he only speaks Kinyarwandan) was very hurt when he found out. The examples Violette used were convincing. After parting, I was reflecting on the seemingly-inappropriate nature of this conversation for Christmas Eve, but yet at the same time on how central *truth* is to everything we celebrate. What, afterall, is the truth of all these events and histories? How can reconciliation occur if both sides sincerely (or insincerely) insist on different versions of reality? Regardless of the truth of either one of their accounts, I am amazed at how, despite the webs of lies and deception and manipulations and lack of insight we are entwined in, God still humbled Himself in order to RECONCILE us to himself, us who do not recognize or acknowledge half of the depth of our sin. His appearance of weakness as a baby allows now for His Strength to be made perfect in Our weakness. Grace.

Merry Christmas (Neheri inziza)
~Mary
Solace Ministries
Rwanda

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A relevent excerpt from With What Remains: A Widow’s Quest for Truth in Rwanda, Lesley Belinda

“…Could I trust them? Was their version true? Were they intentionally missing out certain facts, or exaggerating others? Not knowing who to believe was torment…Was there perhaps some cultural element in the interpretation of truth? Coming from a western culture with a heritage of Greek dichotomy, my understanding of truth tends to be relatively clear cut, black and white. But to my understanding the African concept of truth seems much more fluid and relative. Much more important than absolute truth is the maintenance of community and relationship. Fostering harmony and peace --even if it means missing out or embellishing some of the facts --would always be more important than speaking out the full story, if that might cause hurt or offence…But betrayal is much more profound than just a different approach to truth. How hard it is ever to trust again when betrayal has been so deep. Yet this is the current experience of most Rwandans. If those with whom for years you have lived, worked and worshipped then betray you and murder members of your family, how do you ever trust anyone again?” (196).

“Discovering the truth can be shocking, but it can also be freeing. I realized this was part of the message the government in Rwanda was trying to impart to the population in relation to the Gacaca courts. ‘Ukuri kurakira’ proclaimed huge Gacaca posters along the roadside all over the country. ‘Truth heals.’ On the one hand I could endorse that now, having realized its impact in my own life. But on the other hand, when it came to searching for the truth about Charles’ murder, I knew full well that the process necessary to get there can itself be unbearably traumatic. Hundreds of thousands of Rwandans were having to make that choice in these days. Could they face putting themselves through such torment by reawakening the horrors of the genocide months? If discovering the truth could be the guaranteed end result, it might be worth the agony. But when the pathway to search for truth is strewn with lies and silence, intimidation and dead ends, and the reawakening of pain with no resolution, who would choose to follow it? Remarkably many have and still do, and for them the Gacaca courts have revealed details of the deaths of their loved ones, enabling them to unearth their remains and give them a dignified burial. Some kills have confessed to their crimes and there have been remarkable instances of reconciliation….But, for others, truth remains buried with their families…The resilience and courage of the vast numbers of women and children widowed and orphaned by the genocide humbles me to the core…” (132-3).